Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Boleh Tak Kalau Kau Happy?

A few readers from this blog recently commented about me being selfishly sad over the past few days. 'Too much negativeness,' so they said.

Well, I do not know how actually, but this thing (whatever sadness you guys are talking about) gets to me pretty much easily these days. Usually I just stiff up my upper lips and carry on like usual but not anymore. Probably because I am now actively blogging again and I got myself too carried away with the idea that a blog is where the heart is. It is where every and each little secret you have be put into writings, orchestrated by your own style and wanting.

So I blasted off my musings, my rantings and whatnot into my writings. Little that I forget, that every entry here is exposed to many different people with different identities and personalities who come and read them every and each day, giving out varieties of comments and not to mention those who usually will work out their mind to justify my ideas. Justifying my ideas is fine, but justifying me is not very. Because we both know that this one thing - personal justifications - will one day lead to nasty arguments that many of us are trying to avoid most of the time.

Now, about me being unhappy.

Let's just say that I am undergoing some major changes in my life. These things came one after another; career, study and relationship, and I swear they are driving me nuts. So I need to find a place where I can release my everything, and I chose to blog. This blog, is everything about me.

But I forgot how people see it.

As for now, I start running again. It has been two weeks now since I decided to run, and I spent two to three hours a day running, and then projected myself for some weight-lifting at the gym. Some of my muscles are now aching. I could feel the tendons in my legs pulling. My arms are barely as mobile. My back ache like hell I cannot lean on them. My abs are cramping violently that I can hardly bend forward. My body is painful all over.

But I feel better.

"Cutting releases endorphins, endorphins relieves pain." - Gregory House, M.D.


It4Ch1 said...

actually the amount of endorphins from exercising is little.

Mohamad Nazmi Zaidi said...

'exercising', is just the legit word for whatever activity I did recently for endorphins.

Like those mafias importing boxes of 'Baby Powder' printed on them, you see? who earns billions by selling talcum powder anyway?