Followers

Mighty Jacksparrow is an Earth-based sub-intergalactic blogger who enjoys writing and in the same time entertaining his ever-amusing will-kill-to-read fans with sensationally hilarious and at times dramatic musings. This blog offers endless ideas and results; they might be charming most of the times but could be offending in some others. Therefore, it is always noble to remind that if you enjoy the pieces, carry on reading, but if they upset you, do quietly leave like the evening breeze and not like exploding diarrhea, which exactly what you will look like if you ever lose it on me. Enjoy! :D

Friday, January 09, 2009

Coke dan Botol di Buntut

"Anney. Neslo tarik unne, pere gelas aaa. Sapade, roti kosong unne," kata aku pada pekerja bangsa India tu.

Suasana kedai mamak yang nyaman. Tengok kiri tengok kanan. Tak ada orang. Masih awal pagi. Tapi masih sudah suntuk untuk bersiap sebelum masuk kerja pukul lapan.

Datang dua orang merpati sejoli. Duduk di meja sebelah. Jantan hensem. Perempuannya, hm, boleh-lah. Pakai skirt ketat paras lutut dengan jaket executive. Orang korporat agaknya. Yang jantan pakai sama macam aku. Baju putih, seluar hitam, neck tie. Cuma yang bezanya neck tie aku ada dalam poket dan lengan baju aku dilipat.

"Teh panas?" Muncul seorang mamak bersama segelas teh panas, sebotol Coke dan segelas besar Neslo tarik bertanyakan aku.

"Ille, ille. Neslo tarik." Dan terhidanglah Neslo itu di depan mata aku bersama roti canai yang tiba sekali.

Teh panas dan Coke itu ke meja sebelah. Pagi-pagi buta dah minum Coke perempuan ni. Senggugut nanti baru kau tau.

Aku mula makan dan minum. Sebab lapar, tiga kali suap saja dah habis roti canai tadi. Sambil bersandar aku nyalakan rokok di bibir. Dari jelingan mata aku, terlihat jantan tadi sedang menghembus nafas dari mulut ke bibir gelas teh panasnya. Dan perempuan itu mula-lah.

"Eh you. Tak elok tau tiup air guna mulut."

"Panas sangat la."


"Iya la. Sabar la sikit. Tiup pakai surat khabar ke apa ke. Tapi jangan pakai mulut."


"Kenapa?"


"Nanti nafas you akan form a layer of carbonic acid dekat air tu. Nafas you kan ada karbon dioksida. Takkan you nak minum asid?"



"Ini bukan sakit perut lagi dah yang. Ini dah lain macam dah ni."


Terus lelaki itu letakkan gelasnya ke meja. Bijak. Genius. Berjaya buat lelaki tersebut berfikir tentang fakta kimia pada pukul 7.40 pagi di barisan meja kedai mamak.

Tapi yang aku hairan, perempuan itu boleh pula minum Coke yang dah tentu berasid sebab ada kola. And the punch line? Coke is a goddamn carbonated drink! Don't you know why they call it carbonated?! Have ever wondered why Mentos reacts with Coke to release vast amount of gases around, you smart dear?!



In. Your. Face.


Ahahahahaha LOL

7 comments:

hanis said...

bleh tahan sengal juga eh minah tu!
damn idiot or try to be smart?

IRA said...

hahahhahah gambar tak bole blah ok! mau try ke? hahahaaha

IRA said...

btw part yang "sebelum kau suka aku,aku mau kau tau" . serious ke sume tu psl awak? eeeekkk. hahahahah

mInImOy said...

coke ngan mentos? pe kelas~

i would like to self-admit, when it comes to Coke, please do refer to me.

org ckp, minum Coke and makan durian simultaneously, bleh menyebabkan kematian.

i experimented.

and im still breathing.

for mentos + Coke = minty. sedap gak. but pening pastu.

but one thing not try for sure. if not, adik2, kakak2, abg2 kat luar tu nnt menyesal.

don't consume Coke as your most essential daily food (dlm erti kate lain, segale2nyer Coke la for daily comsumption).

nnt kne diabetes. and byk lg penyakit one after another.

pesanan ikhlas dr Coke addict :p

anyway, dh lame x minum Coke. mulut cam nak ngidam je ni..

Mighty Jacksparrow said...

hanis: fuiyo garangs. takot.

IRA: ha ha ha. gambar itu adalah chomel, ok. dan yep! itu semua tentang kanda, dinda~

Moy: yea true. but my experience told me otherwise. my fren died after coke and a whole lot of durian. it has to achieve a certain amount of chemicals (plus the aromatics) to create such disaster, especially to people with high blood pressure.

IRA said...

eekkkkk. tanak la kawan kalau sume tu betul! hahahahaha

Mighty Jacksparrow said...

haish~ jadi honest takde org kawan, jadi conman pun takde org kawan.

sobs