Thursday, January 26, 2012

Ah, alright.

Project Awesome is now handled with a couple of guys through a blog and twitter account. Here there are:

Project Awesome 2012 Blog

Project Awesome 2012 Twitter

Let's make this a happening one, people!

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Hello everyone :D

Okay. A quick update. I was thinking about making a large collage of pictures of people holding up a piece of paper in which written on it "I'm Awesome!". So I asked my followers in Twitter and some of them gave positive answers. So I'm just gonna jot down some details about it here and let's make it real this time! :D

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Project Awesome! - What is it? / Apa Itu Project Awesome?
Project Awesome! is a project where I will collect photos of people holding a piece of paper with "I'm Awesome!" written on it and turn them into a large collage. The collage will be posted here in the blog. 

Project Awesome adalah satu projek di mana gambar-gambar peserta projek ini akan dikumpulkan menjadi satu kolaj besar dan akan dipaparkan di blog ini. Peserta haruslah memegang sehelai kertas yang tertulis "I'm Awesome!" di atasnya.

Awesome! Why 'Project Awesome!'? / Kenapa Project Awesome?
Project Awesome is designated for unity and self esteem. We always look at other people and wish we could be them and in the same time it was our own self that we keep forgetting. We forget that we are awesome in our own way, never mind what other people say. So why not we make a still memory out of it? Why not be confident in ourselves and shout it out loud, "I'm Awesome!"?

Project Awesome adalah untuk perpaduan dan menambahkan rasa keyakinan diri. Kita selalu melihat kepada orang lain dan berharap agar kita menjadi seperti mereka, dan tanpa kita sedari kita telah melupakan diri kita sendiri. Kita lupa yang kita juga Awesome dalam gaya dan cara kita sendiri tanpa. Tak kisahlah apa pun orang kata kan? Jadi mengapa tidak kita yakin pada diri sendiri dan kata pada mereka, "I'm Awesome!"?

Sure! Who Can Participate? / Cantik! Siapa Boleh Masuk?
ALL OF YOU! This project is profit free and my intention is to collect as many photos as possible and form them into a collage in which I will show to the world that these people are the ones who know just how awesome they are. Anybody with a camera and internet connection can participate :D

SEMUA PUN BOLEH! Projek ini adalah percuma dan bukan untuk wang ringgit. Tujuannya adalah untuk mengumpulkan seberapa banyak gambar untuk kita tunjukkan kepada dunia mereka-mereka yang yakin kepada diri sendiri dan percaya kepada harga diri masing-masing dan berani berkata kepada dunia, "I'm Awesome!". Asalkan ada kamera dan liputan internet, anda layak!

Alright! So What Do We Do? / Terbaik! So Apa Nak Buat Ni?
Simple! First, write "I'm Awesome!" on a piece of paper, take a picture of yourself and send it to me! You can either:- 
1. Email me at nazmizaidi [at] yahoo [dot] com
2. Twitpic them and mention me, @M_Jacksparrow in Twitter
3. Tag me in your picture in Facebook
 Take the best picture you can! Be creative! Be decorative! Be happy! Be awesome! This is the best thing - You can send me as many pictures as you want! 

Senang saja! Tulis "I'm Aweesome!" atas kertas kosong, pegang dan ambil gambar sendiri, dan hantar pada saya! Cara menghantar adalah melalui salah satu cara berikut: 
1. Emel ke nazmizaidi [at] yahoo [dot] com
2. Twitpic dan mensi nama saya, @M_Jacksparrow di Twitter
3. Tag saya pada gambar tersebut di Facebook 
Ambil gambar secantik dan sekreatif mana yang anda mau! Tunjuk yang anda sememangnya awesome! Dan ada lagi - anda boleh hantar seberapa banyak gambar yang anda suka!

Seriously Awesome, Bro! Any Rules? / Gila terbaik bro. Ada syarat tak?
Of course! In order to make this game a fun and clean one, there has to be some rules. The rules are:

1. The pic has to be from head to waist so that your face will be visibly clear in the collage. Don't be shy!
2. Make sure the writing is visible too! Refer to the pic below!
3. As long as there are (a) your face and (b) an A4/A3 size paper with "I'm Awesome" on it, you're up for the game!
4. You HAVE to let others know too! More participants, the better!
5. The pics have to reach me BEFORE 12.00am on 1st of February 2012.  Then onward, I can start making the collage! :D

Mestilah! Untuk menjamin kebaikan projek ini, kenalah ada syarat sedikit! Syarat-syaratnya:

1. Gambar mestilah dari kepala ke pinggang. Jangan mengada-ngada nak malu. Kata awesome kan?
2. Pastikan tulisan "I'm Awesome!" adalah jelas. Lihat contoh gambar di bawah.
3. Asalkan ada (2) muka anda dan (b) kertas bersaiz A4/A3 bertulis "I'm Awesome!", anda layak masuk!
4. Anda KENA bagitau orang lain! Lagi ramai, lagi bagus!
5. Gambar anda perlu sampai pada saya SEBELUM 12.00am 1hb Februari 2012. Lepas tu saya dah nak cantumkan jadi kolaj! :D

Thanks people! Let's make this one an awesome one!

* * *

Template: I'm Awesome!

Saturday, January 21, 2012

6.15pm today.

The phone was ringing. I picked it up, and before I could even say anything, I heard her voice speaking through the tiny HTC:

"Get ready. I'll be there in twenty minutes time."

Then the call was ended. 

Holy crap she's here. 

* * *

Meet Hazirah, mid twenties, 170cm tall, never said anything about weight though, fit young lady, hotness level four-over-five. And this is how she looks like:

 [Photo was removed because she had me at the end of a knife, saying 
"it's either the photo goes, or you do."

The one in red, of course. She's single by the way. 

She came to UTP to hand me a piece of cake and a birthday gift. But only the birthday present was given this day because she ATE my cake because she was hungry on the way here. How very lovely, that act was. I felt loved instantly. 

Nevertheless, this was what she brought me:

An artificial silk necktie from Polo Haus; a combination of three colors with almost suede-like finish on top. Freaking awesome. Feels so smooth and silky. 

Doesn't wrinkle much, fits like a <s>condom</s> glove. I have to admit that I love this one very much. Well this gift made my day alright! Thanks Hazirah! 

p/s: I feel so loved. 

*Based on tweets received as per 1300 hour, 21st January 2012*

* * *

Thank you very much for all the wishes.

Long live the sparrows.

This, of course, is another auto-published entry.

At the time this entry is open to public, which as per the time this is written it is scheduled to be published precisely at 12.00am on January the twenty-first, which would be the day I will be celebrating my twenty-seventh birthday, I may not be in front of the computer by now, for I will be doing any of the following:

1. Having a chilled can of Coke and a tube cigar on the pool chair by the swimming pool with Le Roomie at the Clearwater Sanctuary Golf Resort, Batu Gajah, overlooking the clubhouse lake and the open night sky;
2. Having a chilled can of Coke and a tube cigar while lying next to a bonfire with Le Roomie on the sandy beach of Marina Bay, Lumut, overlooking the wide ocean and the open night sky;
3. Having a chilled can of Coke and a tube of cigar while sitting on the old, wooden bench with Le Roomie at the far end of the platform of the majestic Ipoh Railway Station, overlooking the parked and passing night trains and the open night sky;
4. Having a chilled can of Coke and a tube of cigar in the car with Le Roomie while listening to nice songs while traveling light towards unknown destination, overlooking the empty plains and forests at each side and the open night sky; or,
5. Having a chilled can of Coke and a tube of cigar on my chair in my office at the corner of the huge and dark laboratory with my feet on the table like a boss, all by myself, overlooking the entire laboratory floor and, through the window, the open night sky.

Most likely, if Le Roomie is going out with his wonderful girl again tonight, I will be doing number 5. 

* * *

May I be a better man with better life this year, maybe a good wife and a bright future. Thanks in advance to all who are wishing me on my birthday, I appreciate all of them. May all my wishes and yours come true, and godspeed to all of us. May I be able to laugh and smile again, may my life be free from anymore pain. 

Happy birthday, Jack. Cheers, damnit, cheers to that!

p/s: to me, you're the sweetest ever. Thanks for the call. I love you.

Friday, January 20, 2012

So tomorrow's my birthday. 

27 years old this year. 

Of course, just like most people, on the last day of the year before your age changes again, you get this mixed emotions in your head. Pretty emotional moment this is, if you ask me. So many things happened when I was, and still am, 26 years old. So many great achievements, yet so many heavy losses. And as we speak, it is 12.32am in the morning and since Le Roomie is currently out again with his babe, I am all by myself now, having a cup of coffee and a bit of pipe smoking, doing some bits of reminiscing. 

If the plan went out as anticipated, tomorrow I should be engaged, and with all luck, married. 

But of course, the plan didn't go the way many people and I anticipated. I cough up a little when it comes to this wedding issue actually, and that's the way I would want to put it. A bit of disappointment and a bit of relief. I don't know how exactly I feel about the whole event at this time. Not sure if things are getting better, or I just get used to it already. But in general it is somehow affecting me deep inside. 

I, too, do not expect much for my birthday tomorrow.

I never had any birthday party thrown for me. Of course, there were some very good people other than my own parents who bought me things, particularly my exes. I used to get a Tamiya plastic model from one ex for my birthday, and I liked it very much. Another ex bought me a pack of Costa Rican coffee and a slice of cheesecake with a candle on it, and I liked that too. And another ex bought me a Sony digital picture frame for my birthday, and I liked that one as well. Of course, all these happened when I was in relationship with each of them, and now that I find myself single again, all I could say is that, "oh well".

Well, it's alright really. 

Perhaps being 27 tomorrow will bring me hell of a luck. May my life be blessed with prosperity and wealth and love and health. May I be a successful man this year around too. Maybe there is light at the end of the tunnel. Eventually I'm gonna reach there one day. Maybe the light reach me first, I don't know. I just hope that things will be alright soon. The turmoil will soon fade away, leaving me in total serenity. Perhaps hope is a big word. Maybe I shouldn't hope at all. Maybe I'll appreciate things that way. Maybe I won't get hurt again. Maybe, I really don't know. Maybe I should just hope for tomorrow never come.

Thanks to all who wished me today. 

I love you all.  

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Of all the beautiful things in life, only a handful few are worth looking at. 

And I would want you to know that one of these very few things is you. 

* * *

By chance, Rosy Cheeks and I had histories together. 

Perhaps years of solitary have turned things all in favor. Despite the very bitter ending that we previously had,  Rosy Cheeks and I met again by mere coincidence; a simple meeting that happened at the right time and at the right place. And by all means if anything is 

Sunday, January 15, 2012

In myself, there is hell. 


In there my anger burns. Along with my disappointments, my frustrations, my despair, my sadness and my sorrows. My love, my hatred; mixed. Every day they burn in sky-grabbing fire, hot like always. Char after char of disappointment fuel the soaring flames. Broken dreams and shattered hopes remain witnesses. Ashes of never tomorrows laid upon the barren soil of my deserted plains of extreme emptiness. 

Slowly it consumes me from within, turning me into one cold bastard that cares less about everything. About the suffering of others. About the love of others. About the existence of others, and as well, the totality of others too. 

There were times when the fire burnt so intensely that some of the heat broke loose. 

When that happened, I saw myself being somebody else. At rage. Extreme amount of energy came bursting out from inside. I became awfully quiet. Surrounded in silence. My rational dissipated in my own fiery emotions. And when that happened, especially these days, I had to channel the energy out to keep my sanity in check. 

I had to drain the energy out before the monster in me gets unleashed. 

So I ran. I went to the gym and started lifting weights. Pulling, pushing, punching, kicking. Bucketful of sweats remains a friend. Endless bandages and menthol creams for injured tendons and torn muscles. At times I physically bleed from all the accidents I got. My body was in pain, but I couldn't stop, I pushed over the limits. I pushed till it hurt, and I pushed it till it hurt no more. 

The fire in me, it may never cease. 

I ran till I drop. I lifted weights till I couldn't feel my fingers. Numb. Blue spots around my flesh. Even brushing my teeth in the morning was too painful. Every time I looked at myself in the mirror, I saw some other cuts and bruises appearing. Another swollen joint. Another pain to bear with. And I saw my eyes. They were once shining. What happened? My lips, why aren't they smiling no more? And I felt it. I felt my anger burning again, deep inside me. I felt my lips trembling. I felt my face heating up. 

The monster was back again. 

So I put on my running attire, and I ran again. 

And the hell in me, they keep on burning. 

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

My scribbles on "The Navier-Stokes Equation for Three-Dimensional Planes
at Unsteady State Region".

I'm done with master's.

Looking back, I managed to complete the project in absolutely three years. Empirical, or commonly known as experimental research is one of the few things in scientific research that may consume a lot of time, especially when the project includes a lot of unknown parameters. The time span in experimental research involves a lot of expenses as well, being one of the most field avoided by researchers due to these two very costly expenditures nowadays.  

My research involved a lot of unknown parameters since the fundamentals of it was almost unknown at the time I began the study; involving one of the most abundant biomass in Malaysia that no one actually conducted any particular research on it until in the recent years. These three years of research have been one of the best, if not the most painful, moments in my entire history, from which many experiences were gained, as well as countless losses. 

But they were all worth it. 

Now that I am done with it, it's time to move on with something else. At first, I wanted to get into the industry for a moment or two, mainly for the golden experiences they are offering in the biomass business these days. I received two offers previously, both oversea based, as a principal consultant and associate consultant respectively. The pay was very handsome if you ask me, but I gave a long thought about it and I made my decision earlier thane expected.

I'm going to pursue my Doctor of Philosophy degree, better known as PhD. 

As we speak, I have started the preliminary studies on my current project, which also will involve a lot of biomass and fire, and the estimated time for this project to complete is three years from now. With all hopes, I would like to keep with the given timeline, from which I believe if my estimation is correct I will receive the highest achievement in academics at the age of 29 years old, and in the same time, being one of very few students who went for bachelor degree, master's degree and a PhD all in one go in UTP. 

Insya Allah, it will be very nice to finally achieve something that I really want after all these years of study. With a PhD, it will obviously change the course of my life, although what I really look for is the wisdom behind it. Nevertheless I think that I have made the right choice, and given time and faith I am sure that I will overcome all the incoming obstacles and appear fashionably before the grand chancellor for my scroll sometime in 2014. 

With what I have then, I would like to help others and the country with my expertise, and start building a family with better lifestyle. At least money wouldn't be an issue at that time. But to get there, there's a cost; my time, my money, my health, everything. But I assure you, for the sake of having my wife and kids smiling all day and sleep soundly at night, it worth all the sacrifices I make today. 

Please pray for me, alright? :D

Monday, January 09, 2012

Let me tell you one think I understand about love from all the experiences I had in the past years with or without my own willingness. 

But first I need you to prepare your imagination. 

Picture love as a wonderland. Like a theme park or some sort. The place that every man and woman crave to go and stay for long, especially after listening to those stories, or more like tales, told by those who have been there; the sort of stories one may imagine as magic and extremely pleasing. Those who have been there and back, they express their experiences in the most beautiful way, but sometimes too, in the most goriest fashion. Those who listen make their own mind at that very instant - to go there and stay, or  stay here and never go - by judging from these stories about love wonderland. 

Some of them, especially those who haven't been to love wonderland, or never been there again for a very long time, experience the urge within to go to the land of magic, the land where time stays still, for the sake of experiencing it, if not out of all damned curiosities. 

And when they get there at the very entrance to Love Wonderland, they stand still and stare at the area with such awe in their faces. Palaces made from pure Belgian chocolate, sprinkled with fresh berry cuts and honey drops. Walkaways made from crunchy wafers and butterscotch fingers. Ponds, lakes and rivers filled with molten milk chocolate and caramel, the smell struck their noses like an arrow does to flesh. 

Fruits everywhere, gigantic in size. Gingerbread men go about giving out fresh sweet potato buns. The clear blue sky snows sugar powder. Light breeze brings the sweet smell of hot cocoa and butter. Rich and extraordinary. And from where these awed people are standing, they could hear sounds from afar, of happiness and extreme joy, from those who are already within the perimeter of Love Wonderland. And they run. All the way there to where the sounds are created; in their hearts hopes arise, in their eyes, light alights. 

This, of course, is their first mistake. 

When they reach there, they forget about all the gory stories they heard about the place previously, mainly due to all the joyful things they are currently enjoying to no estimated limits, and this, of course, is their second mistake. They put their guards down because they are extremely comfortable in Love Wonderland, where joy and happiness are at supplied at unlimited regiments. As time goes by (not that they can feel it, since time does not pass in Love Wonderland), they make themselves weaker and vulnerable; open to all incoming attacks, and of course, get easily beaten after that. 

After some time, out of all the sudden, the chocolates no longer taste as good. The gingerbread men are such a bore, the same with their meaningless sweet potato buns. Molten chocolate river and pond they just won't dry, and the sweet smelling air starts to irritatingly irritate. Suddenly, Love Wonderland loses its charm and wonder. 

Some want to leave, some want to stay longer.  

Now, there are only two ways to exit Love Wonderland; by willingly walk pass the mile long field of barbed wires, land mines and literally day and night bombing from heavy artillery bombardment, or, get thrown out from Love Wonderland and made to walk the same path, but for this one, unwillingly. There is no one who can walk out of Love Wonderland in one piece, unaffected. Very seldom one walks out of Love Wonderland without a single scar; most of the time, barely alive. And the only thing that make these men and women to keep walking the mile long field of doom is courage. Just courage. Courage for reality. For the real world. For healing.

Recovery time varies; some very short, some very long. 

But as these people recover, they reminisce the times they had in Love Wonderland. Oh how good the chocolates were. The berry sprinkles all over. And those molten chocolate and caramel that never stopped flowing. And remember the smell? And those silly gingerbread men tossing sweet potato buns around, under the sugar-powder-snowing blue sky? What experiences they were really. As time goes by (this time, time goes by fast in their real world), they forgot about just how they had to bring themselves out from Love Wonderland previously. They forgot about just how Love Wonderland be the reason for their sufferings.

Another mistake.

As their scars heal, they secretly long again for that place. And as to add the joy to it, they share their stories with unsuspecting young chaps and damsels who have not been there to Love Wonderland, increasing their curiosities, and often, they forget to tell them the dark sides of the place. They fail to warn these hopeful young men and women about just how Love Wonderland can cure all life heartaches, and  also be the only, if not all, reason to another, if not bigger, heartache.

And that, of course, is their biggest mistake.

Monday, January 02, 2012

[This is an Islamic post]

I talked to one of my Twitter followers who was recently having some critical nervous breakdown and was clearly in need for some certain motivational heads up. But as much as words could say to lessen the burden within, there is nothing else more meaningful than having an inner peace.  And inner peace is something one has to work for and may not be obtained from anybody else.    

So as to share what I shared with her with the rest of my followers, these are the things you need to do by daily basis in order to obtain a sufficient dose of inner peace and calmness regardless in any kind of situation. The chances of them to work mainly depend on how much you believe it will, simple as that. For me, it works very fine, Alhamdulillah. Maybe you may want to try for yourself and see how they help you facing your daily challenges. 

So here goes.

* * *

The road to obtain an inner peace isn't hard, but isn't as easy as well. These are the procedures:

1. Try hard not to miss to cite Subhanallah 33 times, Alhamdulillah 33 times, Allahuakbar 34 times and Laila ha illallah 41 times every time you're done with each of your daily prayers. Understand the meanings of these words while you cite them calmly one by one. 

2. 15 minutes before the calling for Subuh and Maghrib prayers, cite this: Subhanalllah wabihamdih, Subhanallah wa azam and Astaghfirullah hal azim at least 100 times. Stop around 3 minutes before the adzan and put both your hands in a praying gesture (do'a, not solah) and ask for what you want. Stop when  the adzan starts. Do this daily.

3. Every time in between the adzan and the iqamah and also every time right after you're done with your wudu', always pray for your wishes.

4. When you pray (do'a), say Alhamdulillah and the selawat first before you begin with your wishes, and complete your prayer with selawat and Alhamdulillah. Always pray for others first before praying for yourself.

5. Before you sleep while you are already lying in bed, read this in order: Al-Fatihah 1x, Qursi 1x, Al-Falaq 3x, An-Naas 3x, Al-Ikhlaas 3x, and Bismillahir rahmanir rahim 21x. Then make a prayer and wish for all the things you want, and at the end of the prayer, forgive all the people that have wronged you with all your heart no matter how awful their mistakes were. Do this every day.

6. When you're really in a ponged up situation, sleep early at night and wake up at around 1.30am. Take wudu' and do this in order: Sunnaat Tahajjud 2 raka'ahs, Sunnaat Taubah 2 raka'ahs, Sunnaat Hajaat 2 raka'ahs, Sunnaat Istikharah 2 raka'ahs (if necessary) and Sunnaat Witr 1 raka'ah. This is at the most minimum set. Ask as much as you want and cry as much as you want too. When you pray (do'a), always believe that Allah has heard you and He will take it from there.

7. Tasbih Nabi Yunus. Laa ilahailla anta, subhanaka inni kuntu minazzolimin. Cite that as many times as possible when you are feeling down or are in trouble. Help comes in no time. Worked every dang time for me. 

And as a bonus:

1. Cite Ya Latiff 133 times every morning after Subuh prayer before your do'a. This is to ease all your troubles and to ensure that people around will be kind to you and you will be protected from anyone with bad intentions whole day long.

2. Cite Ya Batiin 3 times after that. This reveals some of Allah's secrets to you, and the secrets that people with bad intentions around keep from you. It's like some spy-intelligence kinda thing. 

* * *

No matter who you are, if you believe in Him, He will always be with you at all time. That is one of many greatest things about Him; He helps you nevertheless, no matter what kind of ponged up motherponger you are. 

Berharap pada orang, kau akan kecewa. Berharap pada Allah, kau akan gembira. Dan ingat juga, yang bila mana Allah mau tolong, tiada siapa boleh halang dan bila Allah mau halang, tiada siapa boleh tolong. 

Sebar-sebarkan lah ya!

A lady friend came today.

If you ask me, she is quite a decent girl alright. The sort of lady that one feels comfortably to hang out with. An exceptional feature would be her talkative characteristic that mainly depends on the audience's perception, to which some may take it formally interesting while some others may not. Nevertheless I find her company very much meaningful today although the time spent was clearly insufficient. And before we knew it it was almost time for her to catch her train. 

On the way there however, there is this gray Gen2 that took over my car at the right lane and I noticed that one of the four ladies in there made a gesture with her mobile phone as if she was taking our pictures. Quite bewildered with what happened, I overtook the car again to make sure if it was me she was snapping. And the gesture happened again. That was when I realized that something fishy was going on. And the lady beside me was startled with the action.

Always keep your tire pressures at the most optimal in case for a chase like this.

In my mind that the lady beside me is not somebody to be taken lightly of. She comes from a respectable family and she has reputations. And with all it takes her reputations must be defended at all costs. In the chase to defend for this lady's honor, and to find out just what the hell is going on, I stepped on the gas and the medium-to-high speed chase began. And I recognized some of the faces in there. 

So what now, a pictorial evidence showing that, oh, he just got his wedding canceled and now he's going out with some other chick already? Oh come on! What was I supposed to do then, sit down and cry all day?

The pursuit lasted for almost 15 minutes until we both stopped next to next at a traffic light and as I looked to my left I could see the driver and the passengers clearly, so I took some snaps of them as well. The snapper just now waved at me in an excited manner, to which I did not know why. The lady next to me was entirely clueless by then, and was holding back real badly. 

When both of us parked our cars separately at the Batu Gajah train station, I went to the car and knocked on the window. The young lady in there opened the door, to which my first question to her was that why was she snapping my pictures, to which she innocently replied that she wasn't at all while trying to show me the pictures in her mobile. I told her to with all accord respect others and bid them good day and walked off to the station where the lady was waiting for me.  

I thanked her for coming and sent her off after giving her a long hug. And she walked off with the brightest smile I ever saw this year. 


* * *

Good thing was that we've got the plate number and some clear photos of them young ladies. Sent the pictures to a friend in Kuala Lumpur via the MMS service to run some checks and the car came out clean. So nothing to worry there but just in case something comes up after this at least we are primarily ahead of things. When I called the guy, the first thing he said was;

"Ha kenapa kau? Kena kejar paparazzi lagi ke?"

I LOL-ed. I feel like a rock star already. But I hope what them ladies did was just for fun and nothing serious. And if you girls are reading this, hey, I'm terribly sorry for crashing at your door just like that and for being rather serious (fierce?). But yeah, I don't enjoy getting my face snapped when I am not ready so, yeah, maybe next time we can take pictures together in a more civilized manner. More awesome that way. 

And look what the lady who came for me gave! :

Smart ass? AWESOME!

Interesting, just how some girls think.

You see, quite too on my own amusement, I would have been less than surprised to acknowledge just how some ladies around me came to think that I am being a complete flirt, if not a serious sex maniac. Often in my conversation I have used repeatably the terms darling, honey, sweetheart and all the sugarcoated words in addressing females who communicated with me whether in real life or not. This is a fact from which many of you have realized and took acknowledgement of it since the very beginning of time. Some took it neutrally, some others took it positively and the rest however, offensively. 

The latter labelled me as 'gatal'.

Of course, in the norm of being females, some ladies who are educated enough will take my behavior as completely out of chivalry, if not excellent courtesy. This however may not apply to the less educated ones. Educated here means the sorts who could use their brains effectively and not necessarily are  academically inclined. And educated here means those who are represented by their civilized and extremely courteous manners, if not being exceptionally sympathetic to others during their rainy days.

You see, it doesn't mean if I flirt with you, you could be one hell of a terrific lady. That is just silly, if you ask me. By right, I would have been able to rate a lady down to the littlest detail and of course, it won't be something that is very hard to do. I mean, do I look like someone who cannot tell just how attractive a lady is? But of course, by means of sheer courtesy I find that every lady has the right to feel extremely intact when it comes to self-confidence, and I often try to boost this by making the communication with them pretty dandy.

Which, of course, some took it wrongly. 

I was initially informed about someone who recently labelled me as quite a pervert in one of the main social media network, and most informatively I found out that this person is someone who I know quite well. Five different individuals came up and informed me about the incident and two of them came up even with printscreens of it. Thanks very much to these good friends of mine who cared enough to stand for my highest level of defense. Of course, the subject in question here did this privately, which most cowards usually do. 

Now that I have been informed, I flipped a coin to see which side I'd get in order to decide what I am going to do about it. 

You see, if I flirt with you, it doesn't mean that you are sizzling, neither you are anywhere near being able to halt me from blinking my eyes for more than three seconds. Snap out of it. Look at the girls around me. Some of them are bombastic enough to blow an average Joe's mind. And you are as ugly as your thoughts are. Let's not deny it, that you are not really the brightest of the lot, so it is not surprising if something like this comes out from someone like you.

I know what you did, darling. And don't take this complimentary darling for real; I just said it just to light up the conversation. And I know that you will come out with more of this, opening up on all the things about me. Yes, you can bark about my failures and even my recent crisis in relationship and share them  openly for a laugh or two just to satisfy your perverse psyche. Like a some sort of entertainment to brighten your otherwise unlit days.

But every action has its price, and we all pay for it in a way or another whether we like it or not. And if I were you, I'll watch my back real good, because if this attitude goes on someday at your weakest point in your life, someone will do similarly as you have done to others and it will be reiterated back to you when you least expected it, perhaps at even a greater value of dice. So be nice, and everyone will be nice to you. Don't take this as a planned bombardment but as a sheer courtesy of advice from someone who is more experienced than yourself. 

Good thing I've got the lovely side of the coin - to forgive

* * *

Just a complimentary reminder for you from a few very best friends that's all.

I forgave you.

They didn't. 

Sunday, January 01, 2012

[This is an auto-published post]

Happy new year everyone. 

This post was written at 5.37pm on the last day the twelfth month of the eleventh year of the second millennium. If I calculate correctly, this post will be published exactly 2 hours after new year.

By now I am pretty sure that everyone has had their good times and is on the way home after the new year celebration, if not still celebrating. Whatever it is, I hope that everyone is happy and dandy just like new year is supposed to be. I can picture you all smiling already.

And at the time this post is published, I am currently doing some ninety on the freeway heading to nowhere. Well if you ask me, I don't really have any plan for the new year, so whatever that pops up into mind at this hour will definitely be a plan to follow. 

Let's just hope it isn't going to be a foolish one. 

* * *

And with that, again, happy new year everyone.

God bless us all.

Captain's log, 31st Dec 2011; 6.12pm.