Friday, January 20, 2012


So tomorrow's my birthday. 

27 years old this year. 

Of course, just like most people, on the last day of the year before your age changes again, you get this mixed emotions in your head. Pretty emotional moment this is, if you ask me. So many things happened when I was, and still am, 26 years old. So many great achievements, yet so many heavy losses. And as we speak, it is 12.32am in the morning and since Le Roomie is currently out again with his babe, I am all by myself now, having a cup of coffee and a bit of pipe smoking, doing some bits of reminiscing. 

If the plan went out as anticipated, tomorrow I should be engaged, and with all luck, married. 

But of course, the plan didn't go the way many people and I anticipated. I cough up a little when it comes to this wedding issue actually, and that's the way I would want to put it. A bit of disappointment and a bit of relief. I don't know how exactly I feel about the whole event at this time. Not sure if things are getting better, or I just get used to it already. But in general it is somehow affecting me deep inside. 

I, too, do not expect much for my birthday tomorrow.

I never had any birthday party thrown for me. Of course, there were some very good people other than my own parents who bought me things, particularly my exes. I used to get a Tamiya plastic model from one ex for my birthday, and I liked it very much. Another ex bought me a pack of Costa Rican coffee and a slice of cheesecake with a candle on it, and I liked that too. And another ex bought me a Sony digital picture frame for my birthday, and I liked that one as well. Of course, all these happened when I was in relationship with each of them, and now that I find myself single again, all I could say is that, "oh well".

Well, it's alright really. 

Perhaps being 27 tomorrow will bring me hell of a luck. May my life be blessed with prosperity and wealth and love and health. May I be a successful man this year around too. Maybe there is light at the end of the tunnel. Eventually I'm gonna reach there one day. Maybe the light reach me first, I don't know. I just hope that things will be alright soon. The turmoil will soon fade away, leaving me in total serenity. Perhaps hope is a big word. Maybe I shouldn't hope at all. Maybe I'll appreciate things that way. Maybe I won't get hurt again. Maybe, I really don't know. Maybe I should just hope for tomorrow never come.

Thanks to all who wished me today. 

I love you all.  

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