Monday, February 13, 2012

A Toast for Valentine's Day

So tomorrow's Valentine's Day. 

Well, I don't really quite remember how exactly I felt about it. 

Valentine's Day to me had always been an eagerly-awaited date every year. Albeit the whole shenanigans about the celebration and all, I've always found that V-Day was exceptionally interesting; it was the day when my partner and I would have spent time together over a pleasant evening dinner and later taking a walk under the starry night sky. Sharing a slice of cheesecake and a large tumbler of hot jasmine tea, the sort of thing. 

This year I will be, if I ever be, celebrating V-Day alone.

Mixed feelings. Much to my own amusement, I feel a bit happy now, noticing that V-Day will kick in in only a few more short hours. I feel good. I feel calm and I feel...better. It would be a cold lie if I'd say that I don't feel a bit taken aback, or maybe a bit sad, knowing that I don't have anyone to share my love with. But I guess I'll just deal with it and be honest with myself and my own true feelings. 

So now, here's a toast:

To my future wife; I still don't know where you are as we speak, and maybe I will never know. Maybe you are out there somewhere, maybe you'll get here someday, or maybe you'll end up lost anyway. Maybe, just like me, you're looking for your other half as well. Or maybe you are already with your other half already. Nevertheless, I hope that you are doing fine, and if you are in a relationship right now, I hope he is treating you well. I'd pray for your well-being and endless serenity and happiness, regardless of the fact that we have yet to meet, or if we ever did, we have yet to know that we are destined to be together, in time. 

To my exes; I would want you all to know that being with each of you was the best time I had in my life. I have learned so many things about loving, being loved and being in love. I have cherished all our memories and laughter shared together; all the perfect moments and imperfect ones, always remembered. Thank you for all the best things we did together and I apologize for all the bad things that led to our breakups. I hope that you all live a happy life with your loved ones, and may this Valentine's Day bring you all the love that I could never be able to give to all of you. 

To my admirers; many thanks for sparing your valuable times and attentions in admiring me, whether openly or secretly. I appreciate all the loves and attentions given to me, all the caring words and supports during my hardest times in life, and all the companies you made during when I was most alone. Thank you for seeing the good and attractive qualities in me, for which you have made my day from knowing that albeit my differences and imperfections, I still am worthy in the eyes of some, if not in the eyes of many. 

Happy Valentine's Day to all of you. May we all love and be blessed all around the year. Cheers. 

p/s: I love you?


namasayatihah said...

know what..the most interesting about YOU. u do hv such amazing way on how to put ur words together.I guess, I am pretty much one of ur admirers..LOL~

U may feel alone today but just so u know, u are not alone. Millions of man n woman out there is alone today knowing that they too hav no one to celebrate the day of love.

who year u will be celebrating love with ur wife..;)


monster_buncit said...

:) the sweetest thing that a guy could post in open for public =)

shera said...

Happy Valentines Jack.

Mohamad Nazmi Zaidi said...

Tihah: haha thanks tihah =D

MB: well was it?

shera: same goes =D

Ainna Zetty Mohamed Nazar said...

your outlook and your writing differs a lot.. yet i do find myself enjoy reading your blog every now and then as it gives me some sort of calmness after reading it. and lets just say that after almost 10 years i'm finally able to read this kind of sincere 'confession' so good luck in finding your future soulmate